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There Should Be A Map

I wonder if you can write feelings out.   There should be a map, markers to keep me on the right path - something to explain where the trail is leading us,  I am in a wilderness I have never been in before.  Every path seems to fade into the forest and I cannot find any markers, no way to define the right way to go.  How do people do this - for gods sake.  This has to be the cruelest moment of loving  -  I have no idea how to be in these moments - I want them to last forever and be over at the same time.  This time right now with Chewie is so raw and full, I can’t put any more inside me and can’t get enough either.  I can’t play these feelings out on a piano to make more room in my soul.  Chewie has become so afraid of the vibrations from the piano that he used to sleep under when I played Rachmaninov or Beethoven or Bach or Chopin - now his teeth chatter and he shakes.  So I stopped playing.  It is nothing to stop this to keep him comfortable.  He has given me everything - everything

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